Sarah Sponcil's life

Jul 09, 2023

By Sarah Sponcil for VolleyballMag.com

It is Saturday, May 5, 2023, and I am boarding another plane for a long flight to a destination I have never visited, but a place I know I was meant to visit.

Throughout my personal and professional life, I have boarded hundreds of planes bound for countless destinations. Some have been with family on vacations ranging from the beautiful beaches in Hawaii and Florida, to Disney World and the Colorado mountains. On other occasions, it has been in fulfillment of my dream to be a professional volleyball athlete traveling throughout the USA as a student-athlete at Loyola Marymount University and UCLA, and as a professional volleyball athlete traveling to over 20 countries on five continents. All of these trips had several things in common. First, the trips were with family, whether that family was my parents and sister, or my teammates, who I also considered family. Second, I knew we would be staying in a great hotel, seeing the sights, and eating in great restaurants. Third, I knew we would be having fun,

Every flight has with it a mixture of both anxiety and excitement, but this was different. It would be to a destination 9,700 miles from my home in California. It would take 36 hours door to door to get there, making it by far the longest journey of either my personal or professional life. But there was no anxiety, only pure energy, and adrenaline. There would be no luxury hotels, no pool or beach time, no rides to rush to. It was a destination that I had never thought to visit before. It was, however, a trip I believe I was destined to make by events occurring 21 months ago. It was a trip in planning for the past four months.

This trip was to Kenya.

The only commonality from the hundreds of other trips I have taken was that there would be volleyball involved.

From the age of 3 to my appearance on the Olympic stage at 24, I was consumed by everything volleyball. While in class at school, in church, on vacation, literally every waking moment, my thoughts were on volleyball. Volleyball became an obsession that eventually drove me to the pinnacle of sports — the Olympics. Little did I know the ultimate impact my obsession with volleyball would have on my life, and how the words and actions of those I loved, and those I came to know and love, would bring clarity and purpose to my life.

The 2020 Olympics were delayed for a year because of Covid, and our qualification for the Games occurred only one month before the Games. There was no time to decompress from all the pressure leading up to gaining one of the two coveted Olympic spots, and little time to celebrate with family and friends. We needed to train and train hard.

I couldn't believe I was about to do something only a fraction of all the athletes in the world get to do. Without really knowing it, every competition I’d been in had led to these Olympic Games. There were two women's beach volleyball teams representing the United States, and I was on one of them. At age 24, I was just one year older than one of my heroes, Misty May-Treanor, was in her 2000 debut.

The Olympics were a bit different in 2021, due to the heavy hand of COVID. Still, the Village was an amazing part of the Olympic experience. No media, no vendors selling Olympic paraphernalia, no unwanted distractions — just athletes being able to be everyday people. Each country had its own building, and it was incredible to be living with the best athletes in the world for two weeks. I just tried to soak up every moment while still getting ready to compete.

Unknown to me at the time, the defining moment that would lead to this trip I’m on occurred on July 27, 2021. We were 1-0 in pool play and training for our match the following day against Kenya.

As Kelly Cheng and I were about to start our training, I was stopped by Gaudencia Makokha, one of the members of Team Kenya. She came up to me with a soft, warm smile and she pulled from her bag a bracelet and placed it in my hand. A gift? The word "KENYA" was boldly displayed across the bracelet, handmade from beautiful beads in colors of the Kenyan flag — red, black, and green. I smiled and said a big "Thank You" as I tucked it in my bag before starting our training. It was one of the quickest interactions I’ve ever had with a fellow athlete, but without a doubt, the most impactful one from my Olympic experience. A seemingly simple gesture at the time, but one with a very profound impact, and one that I relive over and over.

We beat Gaudencia and her partner, Brackcides Agala, the following day, but it wasn't the win over Team Kenya that captured attention. As the days and months passed, that simple gesture got me thinking. Here I am in the most crucial, highly intense, and competitive environment you can be in, the Olympics, but that soft smile, that act of kindness right before facing off in the arena took me aback, it left me in a state of bewilderment!

In my mind it was war. It was blood. We aren't friends, we are competitors. But the look she gave me along with that beautiful, simple gift made me think otherwise. Sport looked different in her eyes, it looked joyful, happy, full of gratefulness, love, love for her competitors, love for the opportunity. As I sat for days and months reflecting on that gesture, I craved to see "sport" through her eyes. I wanted to see her and her home country of Kenya. I wanted to see where this pure joy came from.

We ended up in ninth place in Tokyo. While disappointed (oh, I hate to lose), I felt we played well and justified our performance because I was only 24, less than two years as a professional, and we were the youngest beach volleyball team to ever compete in the Olympics. But something was woefully wrong, and the proverbial shit hit the fan on the return flight home from Tokyo to Los Angeles.

Questions and contradictions were racing through my head, and they wouldn't stop. We got ninth, but I felt sad and empty. I was so happy we made it, but it wasn't enough. Volleyball was my everything, but I felt suffocated by it. I was sitting there asking myself one question after another:

Why do I feel this way? Why do I feel unfulfilled? Why do I feel so empty?

The anxiety was debilitating. I went to the restroom. In there it was just Me vs. Me, one on one. I was on the verge of tears with the questions still flooding my head. The journey to the Olympics was far from easy. I had a couple of moments in those months leading up to it lying in bed crying silently, crying out to God, "Why do I feel this way? I have everything I always wanted. What do you want me to do? Help me!" On each of those occasions, my mom dragged me to church, and the questions and anxiety seemed to disappear. But they had not disappeared, they had only been masked by the moments of solace I received in church.

As I stared into the mirror, all these questions and memories flooding my mind, I burst into tears, and I asked Jesus to help me. Call it a "Come to Jesus Moment," or whatever, I know I cannot weather this storm alone. I want and need His help. Almost immediately, a sense of calm and clarity came over me. I realized volleyball had taken over my entire life. My identity was volleyball. I knew I wasn't put on this earth just to win volleyball matches. I knew deep down there was something so much more that I was called to do.

I’ll call it a light bulb moment, but when I stared at myself in the mirror, I knew deep in my soul that only He can help me understand who I am, and my purpose in this life. I also realized that I put God in a "God Box," and only pulled Him out when I needed Him. With my obsession with volleyball, I put it above all else, and that must change. From that bathroom trip on, I made a promise with myself to get to know this God. To dedicate my life to Him. To serve Him. I stuck to that promise made in that bathroom over the Pacific Ocean. When I got back to L.A., I opened the Bible for the first time in my life and began to read from Genesis 1:1. I had no idea what I was doing, but why not start from the beginning?

As the weeks and months passed by, I continued my connection with God. I took Him out of my God box and made Him a part of my daily life. I read from the bible every day to learn from Him. Prayer became a part of my daily life with a blessing before each meal, for His guidance during crisis, for safe travels, to help those in need, for the safety of family and friends, for His gift of forgiveness. I was learning that I was more than just a volleyball player. I found that I could worship Him, be in service to others, and continue my career with volleyball.

And volleyball became fun again.

My parents have always taught my sister Becca and me that it was an obligation and privilege to give back to our community in any way that we could. To help those less fortunate. It was one of the many lessons I had forgotten as volleyball consumed my every waking minute.

With my spiritual rebirth, I began looking for ways to give back, but not solely volunteering in soup kitchens and food banks, or with my debit card. I wanted something where I could have a greater impact and incorporate sports in the process. I truly believed in the power of sports to change lives, and that sports were in the service of humanity. I prayed for God to help me find a way to help those less fortunate. He soon answered the call.

I was introduced to a not-for-profit organization, World Concern. An amazing organization dedicated to serving people in extreme need because they have an extreme calling — to be the hands and feet of Jesus to a broken world. They bring clean water to the thirsty, they help feed the hungry, they give comfort to the exploited, traumatized, and forgotten. They literally work with people left behind, beyond the end of the road.

I looked at their website and listened to their podcasts and was amazed at their work. They have been working with the most remote villages and impoverished people around the world; among those countries — Kenya. World Concern has been transforming lives in forgotten and underserved, poverty-ridden communities in Kenya for 40 years.

They say God works in mysterious ways. Our spiritual connection was immediate, I was appointed an Ambassador to World Concern, and our trip to Kenya was born.

Eight hours into the flight, as I sat in my seat reflecting on all the moments in time that got me here, I literally felt on top of the world. I pulled out the itinerary for the trip and it was filled, morning to night, with meetings and appearances with the National Olympic Committee Kenya, the Kenyan Volleyball Federation, the Kenyan national volleyball team, their head coach, the head coach of the 2020 Kenyan volleyball Olympic team, schools, trips to ultra remote villages conducting clinics and exhibition matches. I had no idea how this trip would pan out, but I was beyond excited to find out.

Besides my agent sitting next to me, I had yet to meet my teammates for the next nine days. As my heart was racing. I prayed to God for a safe trip, and His blessing over the trip. I was concerned with the swelling and size of my ankles eight hours in, I couldn't sleep, my face was oily, I’d been up for almost 20 hours, but I DID NOT CARE. There was a deep feeling this was going to be the trip of a lifetime and I was totally jazzed. Not in transit to another tournament, but to make a real impact on some of the poorest and forgotten communities and people in the world. I literally felt as if I was flying high and on top of the world. At that very moment, as if ordained, I looked at the real-time travel map on the seat back in front of me. The map showed we were traveling at 40,000 feet at 575 mph and passing DIRECTLY over the North Pole. OMG! I was, literally, at that very moment, on top of the world.

As we arrived in Dubai for a 15-hour layover, we quickly looked to find a nearby hotel hoping to find a soft bed to get a couple of hours of sleep before heading back to the airport. At the hotel, we finally met our World Concern representative and Kenyan expert Katie Toop. Katie is the Director of Transformational Development at World Concern and had lived in Kenya for many years. Katie had also just arrived in Dubai from Seattle where World Concern is HQ’d. After a quick hello and going over the plan for the morning, we all said goodnight and headed to our rooms.

Sleep was a welcome thought but unfortunately wasn't going to happen. There were blogs to finish, and still excitement in the air. Sitting at my computer, I was able to nod off several times, but sleep? No such luck. We had to be back at the airport at 7 a.m. for the five-hour flight from Dubai to Nairobi.

Our flight to Nairobi was spent going over the jam-packed schedule for the next eight days. The meetings, including with the President of the National Olympic Committee Kenya, the President of the Kenyan Volleyball Federation, the head coach of the Kenyan national volleyball team, the head coach of the 2020 Kenyan volleyball Olympic team, and many others. We went over the media schedule for the trip, including on our arrival at the Nairobi airport. We went over each school and village we would visit, the clinics we would conduct, and the exhibition matches we would hold. We talked about the long and arduous travel it would take to reach the villages — hours on dirt roads and trails only a goat could love.

Katie and her team had it all laid out. She was amazing from our first hello in Dubai. The five hours flew by as we discussed the schedule, the Kenyan people, the villages, and even a quick lesson of common greetings in Swahili. Katie had it all figured out, and was calm as can be. I’m anything but.

After a 16-hour flight from Los Angeles to Dubai, a 15-hour layover in Dubai, and a five-hour flight to Nairobi, my team from World Concern and I finally arrived. We collected our bags, including four huge cargo bags, graciously filled with volleyballs donated by USA Volleyball, volleyball nets donated by Volleyball USA, and apparel donated by Wilson Sports, one of my wonderful sponsors. All those items would be given to the schools in Nairobi and the remote villages where we would be conducting clinics and exhibition matches.

We headed through customs and out the doors, bags in tow, to meet our Kenyan welcoming party. What happened next was magical; I received the most heart-warming welcome imaginable.

Waiting for us were Gaudencia Makokha and Brackcides Agala, their Olympic coach Paul Bitok and the Kenyan national volleyball team star Veronica Adhiambo; Harun Mutuma Ringera, World Concern's Kenya country director; and Elias Kamau, World Concern's African area director. Alongside them were members of Kenyan broadcast and print media for a welcome interview.

I hadn't seen Gaudencia and Brackcides for almost two years, and the very minute I walked out into the terminal, they greeted me with open arms. We all went in for a long embrace, and it felt like I was hugging best friends I hadn't seen in years. A hug like that more than made up for the 36-hour trip halfway across the globe.

As we left the airport and traveled to our hotel, they began to tell me all about the history of Kenya, the wildlife and beautiful landscape, and many cool facts about their people. As I sat back and listened to them, I couldn't help but just smile. I could just see how much they loved the people and their country.

Before rolling into our hotel, I asked Gaudencia a simple question, "What is your favorite thing about Kenya?" And without hesitation, she said, "The people. The people are peaceful and loving." From those I had met and seen in just a short period of time in Kenya, I understand what Gaudencia was saying. The Kenyan people really do love each other and serve one another together.

As I got ready for bed just eager to start our day one adventure, I went over to the bed where I had laid that Kenyan scarf I was gifted earlier and written right across it said, "LOVE. PEACE. UNITY." It had only been the first day in Kenya and I could already feel the love. I couldn't wait to get to experience first-hand why Kenya is so special. And I already knew it would not be my last visit to Kenya.

And it all started with a simple gift, a bracelet.

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